Taking off the Religious Glasses: Seeing for the First Time

When I was a teenager, I got glasses for the first time. After putting them on, I walked outside and looked up at the moon. I was absolutely amazed at how clear it looked. I could not believe that this is what most people saw when gazing up the the night sky. Oddly, the opposite was true with regard to religion.

For years, I had felt confident that only by seeing the world through the lens of Christianity could I see clearly. From my early days of being a Christian, I understood that Christianity was a worldview. And I was happy to assess everything by that worldview. I truly viewed everything through the lens of Christianity. What mattered most was what seemed the most “Biblical.” On March 3, 2021, I wrote in my journal: “Christianity is a world view, and a very aggressive one at that. Certain things must or must not be true. That makes intellectual honesty or integrity very hard.”

I did not allow myself to think for myself. If I did not have my Christian glasses on, I closed my eyes. Seeing the world in a non-Christian way was not an option, simply because I was fully convinced that Christianity was true. But my deconstruction was jump-started when I took the glasses off and allowed myself to look around.

Again on March 3, 2021: “I decided to essentially see what it would be like to think like and Agnostic/Atheist. It is strange to say the least. It is a very different feeling.” The awe was similar to when I put my actual glasses on when I was a teenager. The world suddenly seemed so clear. I allowed myself to hear alternative viewpoints. Most importantly, I allowed myself to think.

On March 4, 2021, I said that “Today was a full day with these strange new thoughts.” How interesting that no longer seeing the world through a religious filter seemed so strange to me. But it was so new! Nine months prior, on June 23, 2020, I prayed “God, may I never question your goodness, wisdom, and love.” I am thankful for this unanswered prayer.

In March of 2021, I took my Christian glasses off. It was a strange new feeling, but one that lead to a year of growth and change. Deconstruction is absolutely a worldview change, and that is OK!